I'm Single Again

I can't be fucked going into details, but Su and I broke up. So long and thanks for all the fish etc. . .

Bad Idea

I've learnt today that my stomach capacity is not what I believe it used to be.

I managed to eat a whole pizza for lunch, something I used to manage a few years ago without any problems. But today, it seems to have completely exhausted me.

That's right, I've been incapacitated by a pizza. Somehow, I think this may be considered a somewhat lethal blow to my machoism, but then I look up and see several stuffed toys next to my clock, so I guess that isn't an issue.

How Am I Meant To NOT Make Fun?

I watched the "So You Think You Can Dance" finalle last night whilst flicking between various sitcoms.

I don't know how someone can watch that show and not make comments about how ridiculous and stupid the majority of things on it are. Between guys in skirts with the whole slit thing along one side bit going on, guys in heels, people doing random cartwheels/flips/whatever, and the guy in clogs making random clicking noises with his feet, thrusting his hips and twirling. . . I just can't see how the point of the show is anything other than humour.

Probably the highlight of the show for me was what I like to think of as "whore in a box." Nicole (I think she was the lead singer of the Pussycat Dolls, a group I think is completely without merit, not that anyone needs to really have me tell them that to work it out) in a box singing her little song very badly, coming out and spouting random little whoreism like "I will do anything" (repeated several times so people would get the point that she really will do anything), making the odd dance move and then of course singing badly, especially in the bit where she deviated from the song to get the crowd involved or something.

There are just so many elements of dancing that I think are essentially retarded. Especially dance routines that are supposably telling a story or whatever the hell the point is to them. Explain it as much as you like, you're just making a string of ridiculous motions in an exercise that does not result in anything. Sort of like playing with a Wii, but without the fun.

Sure there are occasional things that look cool, but they're so heavily surrounded by weird shit that all you can do is stop laughing for a moment to go "not bad. . . oh god why the hell are you thrusting your stomach with your hands held out???"

In other news. . . I have no other news, good day all.

Here's Something To Complain About

I've been trying for the last few days to sort out the issues with the monthly newsletter I'm meant to be sending out for work.

I think I've nutted out the problem and solved it, but the problem is that it's slightly too late for this run, so next time I should be able to fire it off without any issues. . .

This time though, I have to sort through the list of error messages that bounced back to me and send them a newsletter, in batches of ten to avoid killing the mail server for the third time. It's a long list.

Howells. It's going to be a long and painstaking process, the perfect thing to bitch about in a blog, no?

Oh that's right!

I'm meant to be updating this thing regularly, aren't I?

Oops.

Well, nothing at all is really happening in my life worth blogging about. There's been no interesting turn of events, nothing so mind bogglingly dull that I had to tell the world in order to ease the pain. . . nothing.

Okay, maybe something, but amongst all the monotony of the world, forgetting my phone this morning probably doesn't rank up there with what I'd normally bother writing about.

GET OFF THE ROAD YOU JACKASS!

So I went for my license today, second try and all that jazz.

It was horrible, I fucked up so many times, forgot to signal, didn't work the clutch smoothly, I even managed to stall the thing. Yet for some reason I managed to pass, so now I need to go get me some wheels.

Finally, I Be Doing Things!

Well, it looks like I'm done with the first 1301 letters that I had to send off. Yes, 1301 letters, I did work out exactly how many letters I printed, signed, folded, stuffed into an envelope with a brochure, sealed, stamped and for about 100 stuck a sticker on the back of.

Now I'm progressing into other tasks that are part of my job. The "important" things. Like reorganising the stationery cupboard, calling a few people to arrange mettings, booking flights, placing orders and taking quotes. Oh, and the occasional bit of bludging.

It's actually not that bad, I've even devised a system to keep track of what I'm meant to be doing. It's a little complicated but I think you'll get the basic idea. . . essentially, I write what I need to do on a post it note and stick it to my desk.

Dozens of post it notes have served their purpose and expired already this week because of this practise, but it's most definitely worth it.

In other news, I'm going for my license tomorrow morning, as well as going out with Su tonight and probably a few other things.

So I'm a busy little beaver who shouldn't be wasting time posting boring old blog posts like this one. But I'll still do it because it's better than actually earning my paycheck.

Xbox ASPLODE!!!~

Dag nammit, I buy myself two games I was really looking forward to, and what do you know, the 360's high failure rate comes to kick me in the ass.

I was rocking out on Guitar Hero 3 when all of a sudden the console resetted and the disk drive apparently jammed. With a little help from a screwdriver and a paperclip I managed to recover the disk, but methinks I need to send the damn console in for repairs.

Which does have a nice bonus of letting me possibly upgrade to a HDMI model for free, but on the other hand, it has the downside of no delicious cake until it gets fixed.

I swear the gaming gods just don't want to shine on me, but at least I have Super Paper Mario to keep me entertained for a few more days. . . the rest of the time I may have to actually find something to occupy meself with.

Print, Sign, Fold, Stuff, Seal, Stamp, Stack. . .

So, turns out what I do at work right now is direct mail advertising.

For those playing at home who have no idea what that is, basically I take a letter (in the form of a word document), do a mail merge with one of our little databases of potential customers, print out the letter, all nicely individually addressed etc on some pretty paper. Then off I go spending hours upon hours signing them all, before folding them neatly and cramming them in an envelope with a brochure.

It sounds more interesting than it is, and I don't think it sounds that interesting.

There are other duties I have to do as well, arrange quotes for things, do orders for stationary. . . all of which I have no real clue about but can fake well enough until I get a good idea of the real way to do things. Except with those quotes, I'm still not too sure how the hell I'm meant to get a quote for something when I've only been given vague instructions of what the thing is. But that's just me.

Oh sure, there are other things that I can actually do and am meant to be doing, but essentially my job right now is filling envelopes with the paper equivalent of targeted spam.

Not bad seeing as it's easier than Subway and pays better, plus they didn't lie to me about the chair.

Hell, today, because the other two aren't in the office (yes, two other people work here, it's a bustling place but I somehow manage to survive the chaos), I'm all alone with my letter stuffing. So I brought in my laptop to have something to keep me sane.

Time to watch the first seven episodes of Heroes season 2 again. . .

Unabandonisedish

I'm so incredibly bored that I figure I might get around to doing something that I haven't done in months.

Or not, rearranging the furniture in my bedroom is a boring activity and there isn't much I can do now that I've got the whole cable TV thing forcing me to leave the TV in the one spot.

Terrible jokes aside, I'm going to try blogging again, if only because I have a strange feeling that life will become incredibly boring in the next couple of weeks and I might as well record the really dull stuff for the world at large to read. Because nobody wants to read blogs about interesting things, now do they?

So, what's happened in my life since I abandoned my blog? Apparently quite a lot, but in reflection not really that much, but let's make a list for shits and giggles.

- Quit Subway
- Got a real job (I actually start tomorrow)
- Abandoned the ideals of being a teenager and turned into a desperate early 20s . . . thing
- Killed my old laptop
- Bought a new one for less than it would have cost to repair the old one (whilst still buying a Mac, which shows JUST how expensive fixing the old one would have been)
- Failed my driving test
- Some other minor things not really making note of

Oh yeah, there was also this thing with this girl named Su, won't bore you with the details but looks like I abandoned the whole single thing as well as the teenage thing, at about the same time too.

Moving right along, it turns out that the real job I got requires me to travel into the CBD every morning to get my ass in by 9am.

Not a problem in the slightest, seeing as Subway (before the whole management thing) required me to do that except instead of getting there at 9am I had to get there at 7:30am. The main difference between TRC and Subway is that TRC is about 750m (call it half a mile to the Americans) from Naked Coffee whereas Subway is pretty much two streets over from it. On the other hand, to avoid walking the 750m WITH coffee, I'd have to walk almost 1km without coffee to catch the train.

So my options are bus from outside my house and get coffee then walk, or train from 1km away and take my chances operating without caffeine.

It also means I can buy myself breakfast from places I know, at least for the initial period until I get used to the stores around my work then I can just catch two buses instead of one, barely walk at all, and get fat and lazy because my job requires very little moving from a comfy chair. At least, so I've been told, unless they lied to me.

They probably lied to me.